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Each day, more relationships fall apart...it seems like the list of things that can end them is endless, but really most of the biggest killers are fairly simple. If your relationship is in danger or has already broken apart, I'm here to help you by listing off some of the main reasons people go their separate ways. Once you know what causes a breakup, you can usually fix it!
1) Cheating. It's, in my opinion, the worst possible thing somebody in a relationship can do. It doesn't just break your partner's heart, it breaks the trust they had in you as well...and even if you can mend your partner's heart and save your relationship, chances are you'll never have that trust again. Do everybody a favor and keep your pants on...don't cheat, one night of fun could mean two lifetimes of heartache.
2) Neglecting your partner's feelings is another really hurtful thing that can cause a breakup, and in fact does a lot of the time. People have emotions, even the guys who like to act like they don't so much...and it really hurts when they're never considered by the person whom the love the most. Always listen to your partner, and be considerate of how he/she feels.
3) Everybody knows that no relationship goes on for very long without the occasional fight...but it's important to not get too fired up in these conflicts. A bad temper and refusal to calm down and listen is the absolute of all the WRONG ways to handle fights. Take things with as level a head as you can muster, and try to address real problems rather than petty squabbles and gripes. Make your fights productive, not destructive.
4) I know it's hilarious in the movies to see a comedy actor's face go white with fear when he sees that the number on his cell phone's Caller ID is his control-freak wife, but in the real world an overbearing partner can really add a lot of stress to a relationship and strain the "victim" to the limits. As much as your partner may love you, you don't want him to get fed up with constant harassment or end up dreading talking to you. Without trust, a relationship will fail...so let go of the reins a bit before the poor person starts running for his/her life!
5) Lack of spontanaeity and fun can be as deadly to a relationship as any other problem, but in my opinion it's the most tragic of all the reasons a couple could break up. No relationship should be allowed to dissolve due to boredom and lack of interest...you two people love each other, so it's a horrible shame to think that you could separate simply from lack of "fun." Don't freak out and become clingy, but make time for each other and do things you both really enjoy. Keep the relationship alive by feeding it good times and warm feelings.
6) Your partner may not leave you because you constantly pop your shoulder or fidget with anything you can get your hands on, but a slew of constant annoying habits can really raise the pressure point in a relationship to the point of explosion. Usually it takes a lot of irritation of this kind to cause real damage, but for crying out loud try to get ahold of yourself. Everyone has a few annoying habits, but if they really bother your partner try to break yourself of them.
This list is by no means the end-all definition of everything that can hurt a relationship, but it covers the biggest offenders and can get you thinking in the right fashion to figure out whatever may be hurting YOUR relationship. If you're currently going through a nasty breakup yourself, thinking about these things and others like them could clue you in as to what's wrong with your relationship and even how to fix it and get your ex back. |