"Do not worry about holding high position; worry rather about playing your proper role." ~Confucius

Here's a great exercise for explore your affluent prospect's values and beliefs, thereby really getting into their mindsets.

It has to do with the idea of social positions - of being "one up", "one down", or "equal" in social levels to another. Because there are so many variants to social position, these are just generalizations, but if you just think of them as one up, one down, and equal, you'll get it and you'll see amazing results with your affluent prospects.

As a nineteen year old, I was working in a health club, and I decided I wanted to be the manager. So I went to see the VP of the company I was working for, and he said to me, 'What can I do for you today, Kenrick?'

I replied, "Well, it's not what you can do for me, it's what I can do for you. You're probably going to think I'm a smart ass, but here's what the deal. I am your top salesman, in the whole company. I hold every single record there is to hold in terms of sales. It's time you made me a manager."

He responded, "Yeah. Sure I am."

To which I responded, "If you don't make me the manager, I'm going to go to your competitor, the one next door to your strongest club, and I will run your club into the ground."

He couldn't believe it. He said, "Are you serious?"

"Dead serious."

"You can't do that," he said.

To which I replied, "What's stopping me?"

He said, "You're not good enough."

"Okay. Goodbye."

I got up and walked out and did just that. And then I recruited all the sales staff I had hired and trained and brought them with me. And then the company had a fit and tried to get me back.

What do these social positions mean?

There's no judgment involved. One person is not "better" than the other, it just has to do with who has the most power in the situation.

Think of it in terms of logical levels of thought. Say I'm eliciting your criteria about selling your house. I finally get to the highest level value which is 'freedom'. For you freedom equals selling your house. You will have freedom if we accomplish selling your house.

If you want to move someone off of a particular position, get a higher value of what they're talking about already and use that value to move them. That's the way you can move people from one thing to another. To do that you have to learn how to jump up and jump down effectively.

Are you approaching everyone as a sales person?

Are you approaching them as if you are one down, like "Please, I hope you could possibly find the time to listen to a few minutes of what I say and if you're not interested I'll leave you alone."

That's baloney.

In order to garner the respect and trust of your affluent prospects, you have to come at these situations from an equal footing and then flawlessly, and quickly, get yourself into the higher position. That's how they understand your value.

This isn't about being an arrogant jerk. It's about learning to maneuver these levels as the situation dictates. Realize that these positions are completely in your head and they are entirely about your intention in the interaction.

As you get better at maneuvering these social levels, you'll understand the value of flexibility and fluidity, and this will impact your persuasion skills immeasurably.